Wednesday, July 2, 2014

To my Daniel on his 18th Birthday. EIGHTEEN?!

The world considers you an adult today. Eighteen years old, you can vote, drive, go to prison, buy property and be a legal guardian to your sisters.  This is totally crazy for me because how on earth could 18 years have flashed by this fast??   Happy birthday Daniel.  You might be an adult in the eyes of this world but you are my boy and I will always stay your mom who worries about you, nags a little, protects you, looks out for you, stays proud of you and just absolutely loves you with everything I have.

The moment of your birth is so clear.  I have told you this before (Getting old, repeating myself!) but the moment you were born I knew that God existed.  I was not what you would call a Christian back then but I just knew without a shadow of a doubt that God really did exist and created you.  I felt so entrusted with you.   Like He was personally handing you over telling me you were mine to raise but you did not belong to me, you belong to Him.   In the early terrifying days of being this young mother I would look at my face in the
mirror and I could see I was forever changed.  Love had come like a massive wave and crashed into me and when I emerged I was not the same person.  I couldn’t believe I was capable of love like that. I cannot wait till you hold your own baby and we make eye contact for that brief intense moment and you get it.
Remember what I am telling you now. Only then will you understand how much I love you.  And don’t make it too soon please!  And not too long either.  Anytime from age 25 will do thank you!! 

We have had so much fun getting you to this point in your life.  I know you are not thrilled with the big nose and skinny legs I have handed you but you have my travel bug and sense of humour too.   Being able to laugh at stuff, it’s important.  Life is still going to throw you many curve balls and I wish I could save you from some of the storms but that isn’t how it works. Know you can always come home and have a place that is safe and dry.  Speaking of home I am so glad you are not moving out yet.  I know I have to let you
go and I have done this bit by bit over the past 5 years but I am not quite ready to have you no longer being around to irritate me and eat all my food and leave your smelly washing lying around.  

For years and years I have been telling people how successful you will be one day.  I am not bragging or being biased but I just know.  I also know way back when there was an old Loebenberg grandpa who prayed blessing and favour over his descendants and this includes you.  You have a path to travel before you get there with lots of hard graft.  Stay humble and learn all you can from those around you.  Do what you do with excellence and passion.   Don’t forget you have to buy me that beach house one day.  Your success will come with responsibility and I am glad you are generous because God will expect you to pay it forward.   
I know you don’t do warm and fuzzy and this is probably the longest thing you have read in forever so I will try and wrap this up.  I am glad your arsehole teenage years are mostly over.  Thanks for not being a
complete brat.  I know half the time you got caught up in the peer pressure of needing to act rebellious or
argumentative because that was the done thing in the arsehole years but I never quite believed you.  I appreciate this new you.  Respectful and more considerate and taking ownership of your studies and your life.   

Daniel please, please be very careful.  Drive carefully, never ever get into your car pissed or anyone else’s car.   Be safe in Thailand and enjoy your adventure.  You are at the brink of your grown up life with endless possibilities and it is so exciting.  Work hard, love hard, laugh hard, be respectful, stay humble, be safe, stay true to who you are and have a blast in this 18th year of your life.  I am so proud to be your mom and enjoy you so much.   LOVE you!!!

1 comment:

  1. Did my comment post!? I don't know it I was logged in when I hit "Publish"!
    If I was then you're getting another message!
    Congratulations on your boy's birthday, Mel and Gary!